A little over a year ago, I was in a car accident. It totaled my mini van. Yes, that’s right, my mini van. I loved that thing. I mean, I don’t see many other vehicles with remote control doors that open at the push of a button…that’s all I’m sayin.
A man wrongfully made a left turn while we were going about 55 mph through a green light and we T-boned him hard. The complete front of my van was smashed in. Both of my boys were with me. Praise God we all had our seat belts on (which is not always the case).
Until that moment, I had never broken a bone in my body. My Toyota Sienna did a fantastic job or protecting us, and the only injury was my left middle finger that broke.
My adrenaline was going so hard and my emotions were all over the place. I didn’t even realize it was broken until about an hour later when it swole up like a hot air balloon and I couldn’t move it.
Again…I had never had a broken bone. I was terrified to go to Quick Care and get x-rays. I had this horrified picture in my mind of the doctor showing me the x-ray results and snapping my finger back in place. AHHH!!! I’m cringing now just at the thought of it.
Had it not been for Bo insisting on me going, I likely would have just left it how it was. The thought of the pain I would feel from setting it back to its correct position scared the mess out of me. I wasn’t sure I could handle it.
(Listen, I know it was only my finger and that people break much worse things. This just proves why I could never be a nurse….and also why Bo has always had to clean up our kids’ vomit. Yikes!!)
Months later, the Lord used that story as a testimony and spoke this to me:
THE PAIN OF AN INJURY IS SMALL IN COMPARISON TO THE PAIN OF THE RECOVERY. THE EXTENT TO WHICH YOU ALLOW YOUR BODY TO HEAL DEPENDS SOLEY ON HOW MUCH PAIN YOU WILL ALLOW YOURSELF TO ENDURE THROUGH THE PROCESS OF RECOVERY.
Pain sucks. Whether it’s physical or emotional, it just sucks. But sometimes it’s necessary. For healing to take place in a relationship, there will likely be pain. Embrace it. Don’t stay in it, but allow it. If you do, the pain will pass. Soon you will forget the aches of the hardship, and years from now, you may even forget how deeply you hurt.
Without the pain, there is no recovery. What’s broken will stay broken.
If you find yourself stuck in a place of bitterness or regret, choose forgiveness! You may be struggling in a relationship with your spouse, a family member, a friend, or even, with yourself. Remember this: forgiveness is an act and a process. You will choose to forgive (the act) and then you’ll make changed, daily actions to show forgiveness (the process).
Walking through crises, I learned that often emotions follow my decisions, not vise versa. If I wait to forgive when I feel like it, it will never happen. I must make a decision to forgive, change my habits, and the emotions will eventually follow. This is part of that “pain of recovery.”
Trust me when I say, you are stronger than what you think!
Growing with you,
Whatever your pain may have been, let me encourage you to embrace the pain of recovery. Choose forgiveness. The feelings may not be immediate, and that’s ok. Choose forgiveness every day and walk in freedom!